Ugh. What a week.

Ugh.Β What a week.

My four children all headed back to school on Wednesday and it wouldn’t be an understatement to say that I was dreading it. I love having them all at home for the holidays at the best of times but this summer just felt like the best ever. And also the quickest summer ever and I just didn’t want it to end. Don’t get me wrong, having four children is hard work, especially when you have a mix of little ones and teens. Keeping everybody happy is never easy but somehow it felt like we cracked it this year.

back to school backpacks mostly yummy mummy blogWhen I came back to an empty quiet house on Wednesday, I cried my eyes out. Big fat snotty tears that ended up in me falling asleep in an exhausted heap. Silly I know. I was an emotional wreck. I missed them from the second I waved them goodbye but it was more than just that. The start of a new school year just feels like such a huge milestone and my tears weren’t just because I missed my house full of babies but also because I am so stupidly proud of them all.

I think having teenagers makes me realise just how quickly time flies once they start school. Terms fly by and before you know it another year has passed. That coupled with the fact that you are handing your precious babies over to the care of virtual strangers for the most part of the day is just heart wrenching. Not being there for every minute of their every day is so hard and that doesn’t get any easier the older they get. Well, not for me anyway. Learning to let go is a huge part of parenthood and it’s not something that I find terribly easy but I’m trying. Honest.

The children of course took their first day back in their stride. I really need to take a leaf out of their book. The little ones were excited to see their friends again and couldn’t wait to tell me all about their new teachers. And the teens both made the expected grunts about having too much work and their teachers being evil. Business as usual. But oh my godfathers that feeling of seeing them at home time after the longest day in history was just priceless. I missed them so much. It doesn’t matter how much your head tells you that they’ll be fine until you have them back in your arms, your heart just won’t listen. You need to know that they are okay, it’s not enough to think that they probably will be. It’s amazing just how much of my happiness is now completely dependant on the happiness of my children since I became a mother. They really are my whole world.

I’m so glad that this week has been a short week, for the children’s sake as much as mine. A nice three day week to soften the blow of being back to the grindstone for them and for me, three days of heartache to endure before once again having a full nest. Roll on three o’clock, Roll on the weekend….

mostly yummy mummy blog

About (Mostly) Yummy Mummy

Blissfully happy (mostly) yummy mummy to four children and (occasional) domestic goddess. Aspiring author and blogger extraordinaire.
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17 Responses to Ugh. What a week.

  1. omg, soo glad to hear i wasn’t the only emotional wreck on wednesday! well, for me it started tuesday evening. with my eldest starting high school this year, as soon as i said good night to him on tuesday, the flood gates opened…and i couldn’t stop the tears! yesterday wasn’t much better as he was tearful because of his nerves. i came to work and just cried some more. thankfully he’s gone fine today and yes, high five to the weekend, it couldn’t come ANY sooner! x

    • Oh my lovely girl! Starting high school is such a HUGE step I think I found that just as hard, if not even harder, than their very first day at primary. I’m so glad he seems to be settling okay that makes it so much easier for us I think. Big hugs x

  2. TheMadHouse says:

    As you know I resemble this! People think I am mad for missing them so much, but they are my most previous things. I made them and I find letting go really hard. I keep reminding myself I am giving them roots to grow wings, but………………

    I fear that things may be worse the week after next – I am in LA for work till Thursday next week!

    • I always think of you when I write posts like this Jen because I know that you totally know where I’m coming from. Good luck for next week too I can’t wait to hear all about it x

  3. kbmanc says:

    Oh dear :( you’ve had me in tears reading this. I feel exactly the same so you have my sympathy and my hugs.
    Like you I have 4, a mix of 2 teen girls and 2 little boys. My youngest started school on Wednesday and I was so proud of him confidently striding into class. He was so ready for school and thrilled to be joining his big brother.
    Now I am facing my eldest leaving for university next weekend and I’m dreading it to say the least. My head tells me she’ll be fine, she’s only going to be 20 mins away and ill be able to see her regularly. I’m sure she’ll be home for her favourite meals and to cuddle her brothers. But my heart is breaking just a little at the thought that she won’t be here, under our roof in our safe and happy home. I’m not quite sure how I’m going to get through it. I can’t tell her how sad I am as I can’t take away any of her excitement. I’m her mum and have to be strong. I apologise for hijacking your blog but as she follows me on all forms of social media I can’t really chat about it there. Everyone tells me ill enjoy the peace but I’m not really very good with my own company and Paul works away all week too so adult conversation is limited. Ill stop rambling, wipe my tears and go make the sausage and mash I promised for tea :)
    😘

  4. adele says:

    Its funny reading this, while I’m reading my three are arguing and fighting but I totally agree. I’ve missed my girls so much and dreaded them going back to school. Next week my baby starts nursery and I’m going to be heart broken I’ll be so lonely.

    I’d keep them all at home if I could. I don’t let many people look after my children and hate passing them on to school to people I don’t know, the best place for them is at home with me.

  5. mrssmusings says:

    I love your post. Someone told me that parenthood is a succession of goodbyes….dear Lord….i have a lot to learn ! Go well

  6. @HelenW71 says:

    This made me swallow a great big lump in my throat. I’m secretly gleeful that Lia being a Sept baby means I get an extra year of her being at home before she starts school. Some people look at me like I’m insane when I say that, but like you I’m v conscious of how quickly the time passes.

    You seem like a lovely, caring Mum. I think your kids are v lucky to have you.

    The statement, “It’s amazing just how much of my happiness is now completely dependant on the happiness of my children since I became a mother.” is possibly the biggest truth of motherhood. You’ve summed it up perfectly.
    Hxx

  7. Iyla is starting pre-school this week, only one morning a week to start with but the thought of it is already bringing me to tears. I am going to be such am emotional wreck when she starts school because you’re right, it is the start of letting them go and that’s so scary x

    • I can’t deny that I have found it really hard to see them all start pre-school then primary school but it’s so bittersweet too because their excitement means that you can’t help but be happy for them at the same time of missing them and not feeling ready to let go! Big hugs lovely x

  8. I completely empathise with you. My little boy started school on Wednesday and although he was totally fine, I had a weep after I dropped him off and then again when I picked him up!

    It’s all made so much harder since I split from their dad, who took them on their second day, so I had to hear about how they got on through a series of text messages and phone calls, when all I really, really wanted was a giant hug from them. Still, I have to remember that their dad loves them just as much as I do…

    Time is going so fast, it seems only yesterday that I was taking my girl to reception for the first time and now she’s in year two. Must remember to cherish every day I have with them, it won’t be long before I’m driving them to university!

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