Nature’s surprise..?

When I was pregnant with my first baby, I was adamant that I didn’t want to find out if we were having a boy or a girl at the scan. My Other Half did want to find out though so I said he could ask but he wasn’t to tell me but on second thoughts, I couldn’t stand the thought of him knowing and me not.. so we compromised.. and I got my own way so we didn’t find out ; )

I wanted it to be a lovely surprise from Mother Nature and I saw it as a reward for surviving labour! I truly and honestly didn’t care if we were having a boy or a girl and either way, I planned on the baby wearing nothing but white as a newborn anyway. During my pregnancy I did have a feeling that I was having a boy (which turned out to be right!) but I loved the excitement of not knowing for the whole nine months.

Then when I was pregnant for the second time, I didn’t want to find out again but I felt so bad that I had got my own way the first time around that I agreed with my Other Half that we would find out this time. But then at the scan, the baby had her legs crossed and they couldn’t tell us and I was secretly really pleased to be having another surprise!

Then roll on another six years or so when I was expecting our third baby, this time around, our eldest two children were desperate to know if the baby would be a boy or a girl! I was really worried about how they would take to having a new baby around and I thought maybe if they knew if they were getting a new brother or sister, it might help them get used to the idea. So we found out that we were having another girl.

Then along came the news of our fourth (and very much bonus) baby surprise. This time around, we had just moved house to accommodate our growing family and now it was about to get even bigger! So for completely practical reasons of deciding the children’s bedrooms etc, we decided to find out and we were in fact expecting another girl!

I have to say that personally, I love the surprise of not finding out but I can see why I, and other people, find out. I mean sometimes there are practical reasons for finding out and also I totally get that people just can’t wait to find out! Having a baby is so exciting after all. And do you know what, it is a lovely surprise on the actual birth day but in all honesty, it is such a momentous day anyway that it doesn’t take away from that if you do find out. It’s a lovely surprise whenever you find out – at the scan or at the birth!

I saw a statistic lately that was split almost 50/50 as to whether people decide to find out or not. So what about you? Did you find out if you were expecting a girl or boy?

Photo credit: Flickr – Vintage portrait of two babies by Beverly and Pack

21 thoughts on “Nature’s surprise..?

  1. Susan Mann says:

    Another great post twinny. I found out with my second and I was glad I did. Gave me a chance to get everything ready and get Lucas ready for a baby bro. I didn’t find out first time around and I am glad I didn’t. If I ever have another I am undecided. xx


  2. mummyinahurry says:

    I am very impatient so I wanted to find out first time around. However hubby didnt want to so I went along with his wishes. I had followed the ‘chinese birth chart’ and convinced myself I was having a girl. I must admit, I was almost tempted to sneak off and have another scan without hubby knowing so that I could find out. After 33 hours of labour and an emergency delivery, no one was more shocked than me when I was presented with a healthy bouncing baby boy. I think my exact words were ‘you have got to be kidding me’! So second time around I insisted on finding out, so that I could sort the clothes and the bedroom. I did enjoy the surprise the first time around, but I also enjoyed knowing the second time. What I really don’t like is where people tell you the sex and the name before the baby arrives. When the baby finally makes it appearance, you have known about it so long it seems like a bit of an anti-climax.


  3. HelenW71 says:

    I’m a 1st time mum-to-be and my OH & I have always agreed that we wouldn’t find out. I’ve always been the kind of girl that doesn’t open presents early as I enjoy looking forward to the suprise. And in this case I’m definitely not going to be disappointed either way!
    We have come under some peer pressure about our decision though – it took us about an hour to convince my SIL that we weren’t joking about not finding out, she just didn’t get it!
    I vary in my inklings as to what we’re going to have. At first I thought a boy as girls are outnumbered 5:1 at this generation in my family. However, since my bump has appeared its shape and position has led to some speculation that it’ll be a girl. Either way I’ll be chuffed to bits as long as it’s healthy and happy.


  4. Sharon says:

    When I had mine, the technology wasn’t sophisticated enough to accurately predict and in a way I’m glad, I liked the surprise. When our fourth was born after three boys, it was an even bigger surprise when she was a girl. (My husband had the ‘snip’ whilst I was pregnant because I knew 4 was enough, whether it had been a girl or boy!)


  5. Liz says:

    I did find out, Hubby wasn’t keen but I needed to know – I am a control freak 🙂 . It was still a surprise, just a few months early!.

    It turns out it was a good idea, hubby was initally upset she wasn’t a boy, but got used to the idea of having a girl. And if we’d been having a boy it would have given me time to get used to the idea, as I was always convinced she was a girl. I don’t like to think how that would have gone if we’d had that after the very difficult labour I had.

    But on the bright side it meant that we had a name picked out and everything ready for her, my control freakishness no doubt 🙂


  6. Red Ted Art says:

    we waited and both were a lovely surprise 🙂 boy first (which we expected for some reason) and girl second (which we didnt expect).


  7. Jenny Paulin says:

    Great topic again!
    I did not want to find out either and, like you, even tough I bought all white newborn clothing I did have an inkling it would be a boy! I just don’t see the point in needing to know – what can you do? It is not like a jumper that you can take back to M & S and exchange for another!! My OH says he wants to know the sex next time but I still don’t – hopefully I will be able to get my own way on that and look forward to another 9 months of not knowing and a wonderful surprise at the end of it 🙂


  8. Pumpkin and Piglet says:

    We found out, we are both just too impatient! It did make organizing things a bit easier and, as we had chosen a name, it meant that we could call her by that rather than ‘bump’! We will probably find out on the next one too. I can see the appeal to having a surprise and part of me would like it but the desire to know is too strong. However, those of us that do find out should remember that they do get it wrong sometimes!!


  9. christinemosler says:

    I found out with all my boys, they couldn’t tell with my girl but I knew. I loved knowing and planning but a teeny bit of me would like to have not been offered the option of knowing! If you know what I mean! (too many knows and knowing there, sorry!)


  10. M says:

    Policy of our local NHS trust is: we don’t scan for sex, so don’t ask. There are private places, naturally, but I wasn’t forking out £100 for a 4-D scan. I was increasingly convinced I was having a boy (little extra boobage, more hair, protein cravings), and was right. If I’d been able to visit my family in Greece during that time, I’d probably have popped into my old gyno’s practice, which is just around the corner from my parents’, and got scanned, but I was grounded for the duration. Can’t say I suffered much for not knowing, but if given the chance to find out, I’d take it.


  11. Scott Oglesby says:

    I personally just couldn’t wait to find out but I’m nothing but a big kid myself. I still can’t wait to open Christmas gifts and WILL search the house looking for them if left alone. And I’m 37 years old now. Sad…I know.

    I admire your self control immensely!


  12. growing_bump says:

    We are expecting our first and don’t know what we’re having. Hubby would’ve found out at 20 week scan but respected the fact that I didn’t want to know. I think it’s made it more exciting for us as it’s a constant topic of conversation between us, our friends and families! There have been times throughout the pregnancy where I’ve been convinced we were having a boy . . . but I’m really not sure. We genuinely have no preference. The last few weeks I’ve felt desperate to know, I think because I keep seeing really cute pink or blue things to buy! But I still managed not to ask at my latest scans because I know that I really want the surprise! A few people have had a real go at me for not finding out which I don’t understand, it’s our decision! I would never have a go at somebody else for finding out the sex, it’s just not what we personally wanted to do.


  13. mummakesafilm says:

    I’m all for the element of surprise. I think the air of mystery just adds to the whole event. It is tempting to know, but i hope to be strong-willed enough to resist whenever the next one comes along.


  14. Lucy Quick says:

    I decided to wait and have it be a surprise with my two – but I can totally understand why some people decide to find out – either because they just can’t wait; or for more practical considerations.


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