We don’t have anyone to babysit for us. Like, ever. This probably conjures up images of my children being absolute horrors but they’re really not. Quite the opposite in fact. They are all at such a great age now. You can take your eyes off them for a minute and be quite sure that they won’t be sticking their fingers into sockets or getting olives stuck up their noses. They are pretty much house trained and even wipe their own bottoms. Well, for the most part at least. I would even go so far to say that they are really easy despite the fact that they outnumber us. In fact, I would say that being with them is (mostly) an absolute pleasure.
Way back when we only had two children, family were always much keener to look after them but once number three came along (never mind number four) offers of babysitting pretty much disappeared. Ironically, in the early days of being at home with four little ones I had probably never needed a break so much in my life but there you go! And even now on the very odd occasion that people might offer, it is strictly one or two children at a time. Of course this means that for the last seven-ish years, Mr Mostly and I haven’t had a single evening out together. But that’s okay. Honestly it is. After so long, it has become our normal I guess.
I have never felt like we have been missing out by not going out in the evening together, like I said, that’s just the way it is. But when our youngest started school in September, it gave us the perfect opportunity to sneak some time together, just the two of us. And we have made the most of it and done just that. A day wandering around York here, lunch out in Leeds there. A sneaky morning at the cinema, maybe afternoon tea in Ilkley. Or sometimes it’s just a trip to Caffe Nero if that’s all Mr Mostly can make time for. I say just but actually I love our little coffee trips and we try to go at least once a week. I must confess that it is so nice to have some time for us at last.
Having been together for almost nineteen years now, we have seen so many of our friends go the full circle of meeting, marrying, having children, divorcing and some are even on to their second marriages. We are the only couple that are still together out of our original crowd and in lots of ways that makes me oh so sad but it also makes me ponder how on earth have we stood the test of time where they have failed. And do you know what, I’m not entirely sure. There have been good times and really rather hairy times but somehow, the good has always outweighed the bad. I’m not sure that I have the answer to a long and happy relationship – well, does anyone?! But I think that making the most of what you do have goes a long way. As does still being able to laugh together. Of course, getting to hold hands over lunch without a little person yelling “Errrr stop it! That’s disgusting!” is just a lovely bonus.